25 January 2014

Last Day of Two

Dear Apricot,
Today is the last day you will ever be two.  I cannot believe how fast the time has flown.
Today, on the last day of two, we are struggling with small things that feel like big things.
Today, on the last day of two, you are as feisty as ever, especially since the attention has not been on you lately.
Today, on the last day of two, I feel something like an inadequate mother.  We should be celebrating more.  I should not be getting frustrated as easily.  You should be better behaved.
Today, on the last day of two, half of the house is sick.  Still sick, I should say.  With Uncle RobinHood at five days, and Daddy at two days, it feels like the sickness will never ever leave us.  This is why the attention on you is lacking.  This is why my frustration point is so very small it is not fair to an adult, let alone someone who is on their last day of being two.
Today, on the last day of two, you are the smartest two-year-old I know - that I have ever known.
Today, on the last day of two, you can write your name clearly, and have been doing so for at least six months.
Today, on the last day of two, you can read small books by yourself with just a little guidance.
Today, on the last day of two, you are my shining star, with so much love and life and energy it brings tears to my eyes.
Today, on the last day of two, you are loud.  Oh so loud.  And excitable.  And fidgety.  And sweet.  Oh so sweet.
Today, on the last day of two, your smile is infectious.
Today, on the last day of two, you are completely potty trained, and have been so for at least six months.  Yes, even through the night.
Today, on the last day of two, you like the simple things.  You do not have many conventional toys, and that's okay with you.  I think even if you did, you would still choose to play with the odd things.  (The flippers from the tinker toys are your choice toys today.)
Today, on the last day of two, we were praying for a brother or sister for you.  We thought you'd have at least one by now and be working on another.  We love the time we get to spend with you, but we know you would absolutely thrive with a sibling.  Not to mention, it would be nice for you to have someone to play with other than Daddy and me.
Today, on the last day of two, your closest friends (other than Daddy and me) are Pancake, Potta-tee-too, Miss Mary and Monkey.
Today, on the last day of two, you sleep with three animals (also your friends):  Piggy aka Bacon, Seal aka Luce (Luce-seal) and Bunny, who is currently your favorite.  Bunny likes to come downstairs in the morning and play with us.
Today, on the last day of two, you still let me rock you at nap-time.  I love rocking you.  Lately I have been singing Hush, Little Baby; reciting The Going to Bed Book by Sandra Boyton; and singing Rock-a-Bye Baby.  You are the one that insists on Rock-a-Bye Baby.
Today, on the last day of two, you still suck your (left) thumb and twirl your hair.  You have been grabbing at your hair since before it was long enough to grab.
Today, on the last day of two, we must tuck you in very tight, "turn your angel on" and also turn on your fan.
Today, on the last day of two, I have tried to soak up as many moments as I possibly can, and yet, the time still seems to zip by me at lighting speed.  It is as if I am trying to grasp the wind.  I never knew how much one little life could fill my heart so much that I love practically everything about you.  Everything you do is wonderful, and cute, and hilarious.  You have so much spunk it's hard to describe.
Today, on the last day of two, you can be an intentional buster.  That's not so fun.  I'm not sure why you do it.  But you're probably just seeing what happens.  Exploring the world, I suppose.
Today, on the last day of two, you have your Momma's rebellion and your Daddy's mischievousness.  Oy vey.
Today, on the last day of two, it is snowing.  It is snowing just like it did on the last full day of my pregnancy.
Today, on the last day of two, I am sitting on the couch looking at balloons from a beloved Aunt, who cares so much.  We are thankful for these balloons because your party was supposed to be today, but it had to be postponed due to the sickness in the house.  We feel bad about that.  But luckily, you're two!  and you don't really realize these types of things yet.  You're napping right now, and I can't wait to see your face with you come downstairs and see your balloons.
Today, on the last day of two, I am praying for a good three-hour nap.  It's the norm still (thank you Jesus), but this week has been a little rough.  And, for whatever reason, the less sleep you get, the less you want to sleep!  Usually you get up at 8, nap from 12-3, and go to bed at 8.
Today, on the last day of two, I love watching you grow and explore and become the little you that you are.
Today, on the last day of two, you are my favorite girl in all the land.
Today, on the last day of two, I love you.
Love and kisses, Momma

03 October 2012

My cup overfloweth

My word has it been five months since my last post?  How's that for inconsistency.  So much has happened in those five months.  Let's take a walk through my memory.

I celebrated my 30th birthday in May.  It was very nice to have all my loved ones celebrate with me.  My mom threw me a party (not a surprise), and fun was had by all.  I am truly blessed.

My Poppop went home to be with the Lord in June.  He was the closest representation of Christ I have ever experienced in my life.  He was truly a man of God.  He would literally give you the shirt off your back.  In fact, that was his ministry.  He would wear Jesus shirts, and if you said you liked it, he would ask you if you would wear it.  If you said yes, he would take it off and give it to you.  We handed out shirts at his memorial service with a wonderful poem telling others to do the same.  I am so glad he is with my Grandmom again, both of them in Heaven yukking it up.  But boy, do I miss the heck out of him.  I didn't glean everything I should, or could, have from him, and for that I am regretful.  I can only take that regret and turn it into something good - really buckling down and digging into my Bible.  I cannot wait to see them again, and I am so thankful I know I will.  I am truly blessed.

After seven months of squatting with my in-laws, we settled on a house at the end of July.  This house is perfect for us.  The previous owners kind of took a bath when they sold it to us, but yay for us!  It was completely done - all the way down to paint - so all we had to do was move in.  We are thankful to Oak's family for taking us in, and we are thankful to have a house of our own again.  I am truly blessed.

We moved into the new house in the beginning of August!  Moving day was so awesome.  We had so many family members help us; we were like a well-oiled machine!  My sister-in-law was fantastic in the days after too, helping us get things out of boxes.  She unpacked the entire kitchen and front room, not to mention the other things I am forgetting.  I am truly blessed.

Let's see... With September came the onset of Apricot's two-year molars!  I believe September 20 was when we started seeing something poke through.  We were glad to discover those little buggers because it's kind of been a nap time-nightmare around here lately.  Not napping, sometimes napping, short napping, needing to be rocked to sleep to make the napping happen... not super fun times.  Also, Miss Apricot was moved from her crib into a big-girl bed!  I saw that she could get her leg (easily) over the top rung of the crib, and it was starting to worry me.  I know a few kids who have fallen out of the crib and broken their arms, so I was concerned for her safety.  Into the big-girl bed it was (which is just her crib mattress on the floor with a slide-under railing).  God gave us a few great days that were smooth.  She laid down and didn't budge when we put her in.  I can't say it's been like that since.  But we're figuring it out.  Other than that, though, Apricot is just a gem.  She is so smart; it's a little scary.  She can count to 20 (if you don't mind missing 13 and 15), recite the days of the week, tell you the sound of the first several letters of the alphabet, sing several songs, recite several nursery rhymes, and is pretty much daytime potty trained.  All of this, really, in the month of September.  She is a light that just shines and makes people smile.  I am truly blessed.

September was also a big month for my siblings!  I am the oldest, and from there we have RobinHood, AirForce, Blue and Twig.  RobinHood made a great life decision and decided to get treatment for a long-time addiction.  He's been through detox, rehab and is back home now.  He's doing daily meetings, and truly seems to have done a 180.  I love spending time with him, and I am so glad he's back!  AirForce, if you couldn't tell, is in the AirForce!  It was great life decision he made quite a few months ago that made us all proud.  He left for bootcamp early in September, and we have been writing letters since.  We are so thankful for his sacrifice!  He has such intelligence, we know he will do well.  Blue started college again.  I believe it is going well, albiet hard.  I don't talk to her much; that is something I have to work on!  And Twig got braces!  She lives with her mom, and I cannot wait to see her.  She is supposed to be coming to spend the weekend with us, and we are super excited.  I am so proud of all of them.  I am truly blessed.

And now it's October.  Wow.  Oak and I are chatting about several things - hoping to do them in the coming months:  visit my dad later this month; hand out glow sticks in lieu of candy for Halloween; go on a date (or two) after Apricot goes to bed; figure out our budget; complete some things on our To Do List; get our dining room table (that we just ordered the other day - we are so excited!) situated, along with extra dishes and silverware to complete the sets; go to VA in November for my grandparent's memorial in Arlington; Christmas decorations... Lots of things.  I am truly blessed.

So now you're all caught up.  Hopefully I won't have another five-month-long dry spell.  But don't hold your breath.  What can I say?  I've got a lot going on.  I am truly blessed.

14 May 2012

Scattered thoughts

Well, it's been nearly three months since my last post.  So much for my very consistant once per month thing I had going on...  Life is scattered.  Well, I guess not life in general, just my brain specifically.

We are house hunting like the dickens.  We are still squatting at Oak's parents, and we are ready to be on our own again.  They're great - his parents.  They really are.  It's not them.  It's just not my house.  It's not my house, it's not my kitchen, it's not my stuff, it's not my room, etcetera etcetera...  I am thankful they are putting us up, but I am very ready to have this be a place I just visit again.

My birthday is this month.  Right now it is still the truth to say I am in my 20s.  I don't care *really* about turning 30... I really don't.  But gosh it is hard to not remember when I thought 30 was ancient.  I don't feel ancient.  Actually, I don't feel old enough to have half the responsibility I have!

Apricot is a wonderful, beautiful, growing, smart SMART little girl.  I know every parent thinks their child is smart, but my goodness this child is smart.  Also, she is defiant.  Love her.

24 February 2012

Mouth full of teeth - and walking!

I am writing on reserved battery power.  That is kind of like "fumes and a prayer" for the computer, I suppose.

Just wanting to say how wonderful my little Apricot is.  She has three new teeth as of today, bringing the count up to a whopping 14!  No wonder our nights have been full of interrupted sleep.  What a trooper!

Apricot also officially started taking steps last month - the 17th of January, but Oak and I did not catch it until the 19th!  What terrible parents are we...  But she has been trucking along full-force for about 4 days now, since the 20th.  It's pretty amazing.  She did not want to have anything to do with walking, really.  Kind of scared of it actually.  Then one day she just started taking a few steps from here to there, and poof!  Now she's trying to run.

We are settling into a routine here...  still work sometimes, still kind of feels like we are on an extended sleepover, still not home but is at the same time, still weird...  But we are managing!  God IS GOOD.

14 January 2012

Perhaps if I repeat it enough it will rise from my heart to my brain

Well, it is January.  My little girl turns one this month.  I cannot believe how fast this year has gone.  I have tried to soak in all of the moments, to savor and cherish them, yet they still seemed to have zipped by me at lightening speed.  Time is funny like that.  It is like trying to catch the wind.  Apricot is growing and flourishing right before our eyes.  She has such a personality on her; it is amazing.  I am still amazed at the miracle that is her.

We moved into Oak's parent's house on January 1.  Let us just say we are still in transition.  Our house (which we now lovingly refer to as 'our shore house') is half packed and vacant of bodies.  We went there last weekend to pack some things, and it was creepy and depressing.  Creepy I guess because no one had been there for a week, and it was just Apricot and me at first - no Oak or Kitty.  Depressing for more than one reason.  I wanted equally to both never see that place again and never leave again.  We still have a lot to do.  If we methodically chip away at it, it really should not take us too long.  As long as we are consistently doing something productive.

On the bright side, we may have found renters!  Holla!  We met, and liked, them.  They have a 3-week-old boy and seem very nice.  They cannot move in until April 1, but that is okay because now we do not have to rush to get our stuff packed.  It stinks a little because we have to carry the mortgage for two months more than we had anticipated, but we think it is worth it.  We are really hoping they work out to be great renters.  Only time will tell.

God is in control of all these things in our lives.  GOD IS IN CONTROL OF ALL THINGS.  God loves us.  I will keep telling myself this.  Romans 12:12, Ephesians 5:20 and also Romans 8:28

13 December 2011

December overwhelmed gratitude

Well Oak said it the best.  December = overwhelmed.  Just thinking about the month of December makes me completely overwhelmed.  In our immediate family we have five birthdays.  In our extended family we have seven birthdays.  Then of course there is Christmas, which is the 'reason for the season' as everyone likes to put it.  I want so badly not to make Christmas about gift giving and stress, but to make it about Christ's birth and family traditions (that we enjoy).

We are trying to get our own traditions set:  cookies, tree, decorating... stuff like that.  But even the cookies seem to be overwhelming.  Our decorations are not out yet.  Hopefully tonight we will put them up.  I have them all set out on the table waiting to be put in their spots.

In addition to the normal yearly stress, we have our own added moving stress.  We are not moving until after Christmas, but that does not mean we aren't looking for houses!  So when we are not shopping for presents or going to parties, we are house hunting.  And can I just tell you I do not see the 'falling market' that everyone is talking about.  Perhaps it is because we are not looking for a run-of-the-mill house.  We want some land on which to run and grow.  Fruit trees and bushes, a garden, possibly a greenhouse later! is what are hopes are for.  Chickens and goats...  okay, that might be a little far-fetched, but maybe not completely!  We have friends 20 minutes from us that have both chickens and goats.  The idea of growing our own food and not having to rely on the supermarket is so very appealing to us (me), but that is for another post entirely.

So... December.  Lord please let us focus on YOU Lord.  Not on the money, or even the house-to-be.  Lord let us appreciate what You have given us.  Our families, friends and all of our loved ones.  Also at the same time, though, Lord, we do not want our loved ones to be disappointed on Christmas, so please help us to find the right gifts for them.  They do not have to be expensive, nor extravagant, but just the right gift that would make someone smile.  Thank You Jesus for all that You do for us.  I cannot imagine a life without You Lord.  I am so thankful for You each day.  And each day You pour so many blessings on me that I am just struck with this incredible awe.  I cannot fathom why You are even bothering with little me, Lord.  You created the universe for crying out loud.  The universe!  Yet You care so much about me that You know the number of hairs on my head.  Thank you.  I am so very VERY grateful.

06 November 2011

Transition and faith!

Well, of course I am posting today - it has been one month since my last post!  I do not mean for so much time to pass without posting; my mind is just so jumbled right now that I cannot seem to form it into anything cohesive.  Here's to giving it a whirl today!

We are officially at the start of The Great Transition.  Oak accepted a job offer a few days ago.  Doing so means we no longer can afford our house, but we knew that going in.  Because in April, his Unemployment runs out, and we would no longer be able to afford our house!  So it was pretty much inevitable.  The position he took is about an hour and a half away from us now - back where we came from.  It is a good thing because we were wanting to move back into the area anyway.  We miss having relationships with the people we love.  Hopefully moving back will give us the freedom to do so.

But this transition...  I put in my notice at work on Thursday since Oak is supposed to start working on November 28.  If we were not moving, we may have entertained the idea of juggling both of us working, but I think we are both thankful we're not doing that.  Yes the money would be nice, but we feel like we can live within our means to not have to need both of us working.  Anyway, the transition.  We have a realtor coming tomorrow to put our house up for rent.  We are hoping to be able to rent it out since selling is kind of not an option right now given this terrible market.  In the meantime, we are working with a different realtor to find us a house closer to Oak's new work and our families.  The good news is that it is a buyer's market.  So we are *hoping* to get a fantastic deal on something.  We're looking to have land to appeal to our self-sustaining mindset.  We'll see.  I know it is ALL in God's hands.

Anyway, back to this transition.  Hopefully we can find a new house, and a renter, before we run out of money.  That would bring us to about January/February.  If we cannot find anything, but hopefully have a renter - but even if we don't, we are invited to move in with my in-laws.  It is very gracious of them to open their house to us, and I used to be pretty excited about it.  The more I think about it though, the more hassle I think it will be.  Gracious yes, convenient no.  We have a cat who is 19 years old.  She pees in places other than her litter box.  Luckily for us, most of our house is hardwood or tile.  Not the case with my in-laws.  We would have to move all of our stuff.  Again.  And, we would have to put our big stuff in storage until we found a house.  I am hoping we can downsize the crap out of our stuff, so moving things will be minimal, but still.  It's an entire four-bedroom house.  With an infant.  And a semi-hoarder who wants so badly to be a minimalist.  And one who is in denial.  We have a lot of stuff is what I mean.

It is just tough because we have a lot of things To Be Determined.  It makes it a little hard to do our daily activities.  For me anyway.
I am publishing this without even reading it back!  I have to go help Oak outside like I said I would.